When I was talking about hunger in the last entry I was talking about “feeling hungry”. Off course the effects of anxiety and groundlessness were initiated by the practice of “not eating”, but I was not “hungry”: not craving for food. I only had the anxiety effects, and a deeply spiritual moment. To make the difference is taking a leave from the direct attachment, psychological demand to be full, I think. To let go of the idea that not having something is a bad thing. To, in that way, discover another kind of freedom.
I just finished my meditation-body-practice of the day. For the first time I let things happen in the time needed besides knowing the schedule ahead, which means letting the machine adopt its own agenda for the sake of its change and renewal. And it feels as if I am levitating – me and the machine suspended by the care of time. Living each step of the doing here in its fullness of time.